Losing a pregnancy is an emotional experience for a couple as they’re forced to deal with the lingering grief and pain. Although the grieving that naturally occurs after a stillbirth or miscarriage can bring a couple closer together, it often takes a toll on the marriage or partnership – sometimes leading to a break-up.

According to a new study published in the journal Pediatrics, the risk of a couple breaking up or divorcing is higher after a stillbirth or miscarriage. After studying 3,700 couples who had lost a pregnancy, researchers found that the risk of a relationship dissolving was forty percent higher for couples after a stillbirth and twenty-two percent greater in couples who had had a miscarriage.

Even more surprising is the fact that the risk of a couple parting after a stillbirth was still high as long as ten years after the event – whereas the risk of break-up after a miscarriage peaked at around three years. The disturbing figures are that six out of ten couples end their relationship within ten years after a stillbirth and half of all couples end their relationship after a miscarriage.

Could there be another factor that accounts for such a high rate of relationship break-ups after a miscarriage or stillbirth? Researchers controlled for factors such as age, financial status, and whether or not a couple was married that could have affected the results – but the association was still seen.

This study shows how stressful a stillbirth or miscarriage can be and the devastating effects it can have on a relationship. Problems may arise because men and women deal with grief differently. After a stillbirth or miscarriage, women are more likely to look for emotional support while the man is expected to “be strong”. This can create problems when the man is not encouraged to express his emotions and feelings about the experience directly. This can cause a break down in communication between the grieving couple, at a time when it’s more important than ever to talk.

What’s the best way to deal with relationship problems after a stillbirth or pregnancy loss? It’s possible for a couple to become closer after losing a baby if they’re able to communicate and share their feelings of grief. In some cases, short-term counseling as a couple may be needed to help sort through the issues and get the relationship back on track. Any couple who experiences this unfortunate event shouldn’t be afraid to ask for help in dealing with the grief – so they can face the future again – as a team.

References:

Medscape.com website. “Couples’ Risk of Break-Up Higher After Pregnancy Loss.”

Filed under: Fitness

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